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The Life and Times of a Super Fighting Robot [entries|friends|calendar]

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nerd swoon [02 Aug 2012|12:07am]
The girl that cut my hair today said I looked like Joss Whedon. Then she proceeded to proclaim her love of the Nightmare on Elm Street series and horror movies.
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Lost the password [30 Jul 2012|08:50am]
That's a bad start.

I have about 10 hours of overtime on my next check. Cha-ching.

I have this grand wanderlust. I have a road trip planned. More of a journey kinda thing.
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Is this thing on? [29 Jul 2012|12:47am]
[ mood | blah ]

I can't believe this hasn't fallen to the wayside yet. It's just, I don't know, here - forever on the realms of the Interwebs. My life. For what, nearly six years? What am I doing back here? I bartend now. Only a single day a week, open to close on Tuesdays. It's the best day of the week. I don't know how I landed it, to be honest. In either case, there was someone who was in that told me how important it was to journal. It was a weird thing, to be completely honest - this guy, I don't know who he was, it was his first time there. This guy preached on the importance of journaling. Doing exactly what I did so religiously for a good chunk of my life. So here I am. He said be it two sentences a day, just do it. And he's right. I don't do this anymore. I don't write anymore. I have a feature-length script idea that I've worked on for about two years now, piecing it together, that I haven't started writing yet. I have a good half of the treatment done. Did I tell you? Script-writing is a new dream of mine. Is it a problem of motivation? Sure, maybe it is. It could be because I'm just not used to the whole processing of just sitting at the computer and letting my brain go on auto-pilot and let my fingers just flow. I don't know. All I know is that there's been a lot brewing in my head lately, and I need an outlet. As of right now, there's only ONE person on my friends list that seems to be regularly updated. That's fine. Solid Snake, hi! Miss me? I hope I get back into this habit. I hope this helps.

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Brief notes [18 Oct 2010|08:33pm]
I've bookmarked the site to keep me back in the process of updating this weekly.

I've been out for about over a year now. My parents still do not know.

Being the staunch Nintendo fanboy I am, I recently bought a PS2 and an XBox 360. Yikes! Loving the 360.

I'm a college graduate now. I'm in the in-between of adulthood and a kid. I'm scared. More on this another day.

I'm still single. Still lonely. I'm dealing with it.

I've been seeing an university counselor for awhile now; to begin with, to help with serious depression. Now it's for a mix of career counseling and just talking. It's nice to have him.

And I'm starting to exercise and jog.
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I need to start doing this again. [16 Oct 2010|09:30pm]
[ mood | determined ]

God, so much has changed since I last blogged regularly. For me to have kept this updated for this long, to let it die out seems like a travesty. I only have one LJ friend that stays regularly updated now, it seems, and I miss the writing. So much has gone on since I graduated college, I need to do this again.

And I will.

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Okay, so this new thing? [12 Feb 2010|12:03am]
[ mood | bored ]

I dunno', doing the over-analyzing thing too much and I'm trying very hard not too, but this is my first real time pursuing a guy. I've already gone over what's been going on to my friends so it's okay, I'm not going to rehash it all here... though you haven't heard about it. Hm. Nah, it's not good. In any case... giving it time. I don't want to ruin it. Though of course, my Negative Nancy friend visits and is like, LOL YOU ALREADY HAVE LOSER. I'm having a couple brewskis right now and contemplating calling Dr. Drew on Love Line. I'm addicted to Love Line. But it's already over.


On the plus side, uh, I got distracted by facebook in the other tab, and totally forgot what I was going to say.

Things are okay... I guess... I'm remaining wicked positive about the majority of stuff, cautiously optimistic about some, and just whatever about others.

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This is new. [05 Feb 2010|10:43pm]
[ mood | excited ]

I hope I don't fuck this up.

Went to a local 24 hour diner, got waited on by this real cute guy. My buddy was like "I bet you won't leave your number, be adventurous for once" so I'm like "stfu" and I did it.

Kid went to my high school, a few years younger than me, but I don't think he knew who I was. I shot him a facebook friend request, he accepted (!!! (but I guess not really because people accept random strangers )).

And I lead in with the lamest fucking thing on his wall, "holy shit, I knew you looked familiar, 'sup fellow GHSer" (<initials of the school). Conversation has started where we're starting to get to know each other. It's reciprocal question asking (see that's the kinda' over-analyzing shit I shouldn't think of).Haven't gone back in the diner yet, legitimately not had time, and call me out because I'm sure someone is gonna' be like LOL STALKERFACE. It's just, this is weird, I'm sure my social awkwardness is gonna' fuck me in the end, but from what I've heard, this kid is really weird, too, and kinda' goofy in that social misfit way. I'm just wigging out about the next trip into the diner.

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Okay, so, did something rare for me. [04 Feb 2010|12:08pm]
[ mood | optimistic ]

It's minor, but something I don't usually do. Left a very cute waiter my phone number. Went to high school with him, I don't think he knows me, but whatever. This was a few days ago, no call back, but hey, I did something I don't usually do. Score points for adventurous me.

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LOST season premire in 4 days; speculation and theories ahoy [30 Jan 2010|11:22am]
[ mood | excited ]

I'm super excited to see what they do with this series.

I'm calling it; a huge theme in the final year is going to be this Man of Science, Man of Faith argument that's been going on forever.

The two forces of the island, Jacob and the Man in Black, both represent a scientific issue (perhaps one of them is a Dharma Initiative experiment gone awry) and a crazy, spiritual issue. And that's the crux of season 6. Or something.

I'm going to edit this and update this with a few random theories and speculation, seeing as how I'm kinda' bored.

Ever since the time-travel aspect was made known to the show, I've said that Jack has experienced events before. Why?

In the pilot, Jack is away from the main crash site when he wakes up. He's lying on his back. Vincent gets sent over by Christian to wake him up (in a mobisode, this is cannon, btw). Jack wakes up, and boom, he's out to save the day and just be... well, Jack.

The position of him when he wakes up is really, really similar to the position that Locke and Ben both end up when they awake in the desert after turning the wheel under the island. And his position, away from the crash, can't be just written off; I think he did something off island that we haven't seen yet to relive the events of Oceanic 815 and attempt to change them for the better. He's been through this once and the outcome didn't go the way he planned.

Through course-correction, the island tries to fuck Jack's shit; he almost dies in a cave collapse, he nearly drowns, his appendix nearly bursts... but because of some variables in the show (Juliet, Charlie, etc) he survives.

Jack is different from the survivors; this much is made clear when Mr. Friendly is like "He wasn't even on Jacob's list!"

I'm calling it, Rose and Bernard were dead when they showed up in The Incident. They were Jacob and the Man in Black, respectively. Their sentiments, especially Rose's, when it comes to the antics of the survivors echoes Jacob's and MIB's conversation in the start. And I found the glance that Bernard gave Juliet when he asked if she wanted to stay for tea a bit... knowing?

And Juliet is super special. I always had this random idea of these characters being variables and constants in a giant equation; this was moreso based on the idea of how many giant events in the show wouldn't have happened if a certain character wasn't around to save the day or do something. This is just me free thinking, but Charlie saved Jack in season one and died pretty quickly after that. Eko was a driving force in the events of the second season, and he was taken care of. Hell, most of the '77 survivors should've been outta' the picture, but due to Jacob bringing back the Ajira folk, they're back in the game. I don't know, it was just more random free-thought theory than anything else. I still believe Juliet's a heavy character for the mythology.

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I'm having a night. [23 Jan 2010|10:59pm]
[ mood | scared ]

Every wonder how many people would say "hi" to you if you didn't say it to them first?

Am I crazy for just wondering about this? I'm always the person that greets others. Nobody greets me. I'm tempted to do an experiment, but I'm fearful for what the results might be.

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My Fear Notebook [22 Jan 2010|02:06pm]
[ mood | amused ]

In an effort to improve myself and get myself out of self-imposed comfort zones and areas, I've decided to create a fear notebook. In this notebook, which I plan on carrying around with me everywhere, I've listed (as of right now) 32 things I'm afraid of doing. Some relate to each other; some are just little sayings and mantras that I need to prove to myself are either true or false. In an effort to take care of 32, I've decided to make this public. I'm well aware of some of the humor and silliness of these things; trust me. A lot of it is social skills and my own feelings of self-inadequacy that I wish to overcome. I figure that posting this will help keep me honest; it's public, it's out there, and once other people see this, they can keep me... I dunno', on the right path?

1. Tell him
2. Physical intimacy
3. Wax body hair (chest and back specifically)
4. Go clean shaven, no beard, for a month
5. Sing in front of a large group of people
6. Dance
7. No rely on alcohol to do any of these things
8. Go to a party and not wallflower it
9. Say hi to attractive people more often
10. Stand up for yourself
11. Be nice to his mother
12. Be comfortable in your clothes
13. Put yourself in the spotlight and be okay with it
14. No marijuana until April 20th, at least
15. Swim
16. Do not be afraid of small talk
17. Don't avoid people you find attractive
18. Don't wait for the gym shower to be empty before going in.
19. Go to a gay bar.
20. Find out what "out there" is and put yourself there
21. Get to be more comfortable talking to tables and customers.
22. Try a new hair cut.
23. Shyness is a myth. Prove it.
24. If you see her, talk to her!
25. Confront unnecessary drama and don't leave any elephants in the room.
26. Do not be compelled to do what others think you should do.
27. If something bothers you, mention it; don't let it go.
28. The past does not dictate your future. Prove it.
29. Do an approach. Do many approaches.
30. Assert yourself.
31. Go to a popular, weekend kinda' bar and do not stop yourself from having a good time.
32. Allow yourself to be honest with your emotions, feelings and thoughts.
33. Go to a gay party.

Interesting note; I've made progress on a few of them. So, go me?

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I know someone in every one of my classes. [21 Jan 2010|01:34pm]
[ mood | peaceful ]

This is rare and very comforting.

I recently went out and spent $100 on new clothes. I'm wearing my hair a bit more stylish. I'm trying out new styles and shit to improve my confidence.

So far, it's working pretty okay. I feel better when I leave the house. I feel more comfortable (so far) small-talking in class. To strangers, no less!

It's a start, right? I'm starting to be a firm believer in the clothes making the man.

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There's something wrong with Hollywood when Avatar wins Best Drama. [19 Jan 2010|11:48am]
[ mood | thoughtful ]

Something even worse when The Hangover beats out 500 Days of Summer.

And Downey Jr. beat Levitt for Sherlock Holmes.

Fuck you, Hollywood. If you had the time to take your mouths off of Cameron's dick, you'd be able to give these awards to the right people.

First day of my last semester... my Tuesdays have a 5 hour break between them. Thinking of going to the mall either today or tomorrow to do some clothes shopping. Maybe a movie now. I'm sleepy. It's 11:45 and my next class is at 3:30.

I have to get my back waxed too. I didn't talk about the fear notebook? I didn't talk about the fear notebook. I forget I have about 16 weeks of information to update with. That's for another day.

I was taking a shit in the handicapped stall on campus. I heard the familiar CLICK, CLICK, CLICK of one of those guys that has the supporter-things on his arm to help him walk. Like, I don't know, a fourth set of legs or some shit. I'm doing a piss-poor job explaining it.

Brief panic overwhelmed me as I was in mid-shit and really couldn't speed the process up. Thankfully, he passed by the bathroom.

And I realized that whenever I need to take a shit in a public place, it's the handicapped stall.

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My hours keep being cut at my job. [15 Jan 2010|02:10pm]
[ mood | annoyed ]

Still serving. I've lost a day shift. The place is struggling. I'm kinda' angry about this. Scratch that - really angry about this.

Classes start next week... last semester of college, ohshit. Then... uh... yikes... what then? Uh...

I'm just glad classes are starting back up. Keeps my mind busy and off of things.

Odd thought; I seemed to be less paranoid while smoking pot. Huh.

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Avatar fans experience depression, suicidal thoughts; unable to cope with Pandora being only a fanta [12 Jan 2010|11:31am]
[ mood | annoyed ]


Thank God the forums have some help for people!


Avatar was one of the films nominated for Best Original Screenplay by the Writer's Guild of America.

Best. ORIGINAL. Screenplay.


Fuck you, James Cameron, you and your one-trick pony. Sci-fi by numbers plot gets a best original screenplay nomination. FUCK YOU.

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So here's a bit of what happened. [11 Jan 2010|03:41pm]
1. I'm out.

The only people that don't know are my parents. I'd prefer it to stay that way. I think my mother has a sneaking idea, but it's okay; she's not bringing it up. The transition has been one that has been helped by a core group of friends, both old and new. My false assumption that this should make things easier has been, well, proven false. A whole new host of problems have popped up in it's place... most of which I'm prepared and willing to deal with.

Some, such as having feelings for people that you don't want to have feelings for... that kinda' sucks. There's probably gonna' be more on that later. That's... sensitive, I think; or maybe I'm just paranoid. That entry will be locked.

So far, the biggest problem I've faced, is people asking me "Are you sure?"

That bothers the fuck outta' me. Especially when people like to throw in my lack of sexual experience, too. The marijuana was a crutch, it really was; when I was stoned, I wasn't wondering about my sexuality or whether or not it's weird for my porno-viewing habits to be strictly the same-sex. I do venture into the opposite sex (HEY-OH), but not enough to make me not question it. Plus, this isn't something new. My viewing habits have been like this for a long time. I can't let denial run my life anymore. I've accepted it. My friends have too. I have good friends.

2. I quit marijuana. For good.

It's silly to most people, sure, but for a guy who was stoned literally EVERY DAY for the majority of the day... it's been since... I think September 13th? This still has ups and downs for me. I've gotten rid of all of my smoking tools and devices. The only reminders really are just the stoner-comedy DVDs I'd buy and toke to. They still retain some novelty value for me... I mean, I can't just turn my back on my past.

There are times when I really want to. Bad. As much as I'd hate to say it, my nerves and tendency to over-think and over-analyze things is still with me. The pot would help it. But I don't know.

3. Script-writing.

I took a class in television script writing as an elective. Our five-person group, which was picked the second day of the semester, was charged with researching and writing an hour-long episodic script for a drama currently on the air. We picked Supernatural, on the CW. It was one of the most rewarding and fun experiences I've ever had.

We bought Final Draft, the industry standard software for scriptwriting, and we churned out a script that got 99/100. This professor is brutally tough, too. She said that this script was "one of the best that has come across my desk in a long, long time". We were on cloud nine.

At the end of the semester, she forces us to enter into a national scriptwriting competition and compete with colleges around the country. The competition and rewards ceremony is held in Vegas (!!!), and if we win, we get to go and get our $1,000 cash prize (per person), plaques, and something really fucking cool to have on our resume. Her track record for every class is that at least every year, a group in her class places first, second, or third. She says that we have a great, great chance of placing. She said that you can meet industry connections and that more than a few studios and companies send out head-hunters to see what you can do.

We find out whether or not we win on February 12th. This would be absolutely amazing for me, as writing this script was a blast. I would love to try and do this for a living.

As of right now, that's all I can think of. It feels good to do this again. Blog, I mean.
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It's been 16 weeks? [09 Jan 2010|11:41pm]
[ mood | cranky ]

Christ. A lot has happened since then, a lot that has pretty much reaffirmed the fact that I need an outlet. And this is it. I don't know why I stopped writing, I just did. And I need a way to vent, to talk about stuff. I'm going to make a conscious effort to keep this updated in the new year. There's so much coming up. I'm on my last semester of college, for Christ's sake. Yikes. I think I'm gonna' need you.

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Meg... [17 Sep 2009|02:26am]
Her dad called the place today. Said that she can't work there anymore. According to a co-worker, he didn't want the 25 year old guy at the workplace coming onto her. I think he meant me. Fuck.
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I don't want to freak people out... [12 Sep 2009|01:30pm]
... but when do you classify "suicidal thoughts" as, well, that?
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Healthy? [10 Sep 2009|10:31am]
[ mood | blah ]

I've decided to be single for the rest of my life.

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